How to feel more connected in a long distant relationship

The best way to keep your relationship alive and committed is to converse with each other. A lot of couples actually don’t talk even when they are in a long-distance relationship. The problem with not talking is the fact that you are missing out on so many things that he might have to tell you. This is a two-way street, so don’t expect only your boyfriend to call you or communicate with you. Take extra efforts to call him, FaceTime with him, interact to him on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and of course Whatsapp. There so many social networking sites that connect two people from different countries.

So never blame distance as one of the main reasons for a dying relationship. Whether you are twenty miles away, five miles or a thousand five hundred miles away, it has nothing to do with distance when you can communicate and keep your relationship alive.

There is a reason why many people say that honesty is the best policy. A lot of relationships break due to trust and dishonesty. While you expect your boyfriend to be honest about his feelings to you, it is very much advisable that even you showcase your feelings to him. No matter how hard, big or small the issue is, you need to stay transparent to your partner.

Telling him everything without hiding makes you a better person. When you’re transparent, you have nothing to worry about. So always speak the truth even if it is about him or his behavior. Speaking up for yourself or conveying plain truth will make your boyfriend realize how important it is for you to come clean to him. If you are trustworthy and if you don’t hide or lie anything, there is no reason why your boyfriend should lie as well.

When your relationship is new, you tend to share a common interest. But after a few months or years, couples start wondering as to what they should talk and what they should not. There is lack of topics to cover and you feel that the talks are mundane and boring. If you both share a common interest then speak about that. In a long distance relationship anything that interests both of you can be a topic of excellence.

Do you both enjoy a particular movie, an artist, book or maybe an extracurricular activity? Then, talk about all that and make sure that you both know what each other feel about it. The whole point of sharing a common interest is just to discuss and keep you actively busy with each other. Though physically you guys are not together, the interest of updating each other will never die if you share.

Being spontaneous and doing something unexpected can be a great way of bringing closeness and feeling connected in a long distance relationship. This could be anything small or even big. You could probably draft a mail of all every memory together, you could just send him a gift package of something he has been wanting since long time. If you are good at crafting, then try to make a small handcrafted card and pen down all your love through words in the card. It does not have to be materialistic at all to do something surprising. You can even plan a surprise visit.

Do not tell your boyfriend in advance that you are coming to visit him. Just check his availability and surprise him at his doorstep. There can’t be anything more surprising than your physical presence.

As a couple it is very important for you to discuss your expectations and suit it according to the people that you are. A lot of couples don’t understand that expectations are something that can vary from person to person. You might want to get married in probably one year. But realistic situations might not let you do that. Your boyfriend may want to get married only after 3 to 4 years. So it is always better to discuss expectations and reality so that you don’t clash when it comes to accepting on similar grounds.

-Pavithra Ravi