Why should you come out of a toxic relationship

Staying alone and being lonely is all the same. It is just how you see it. If you are going to be lonely in a relationship which involves two people, what is the big difference between being by yourself and being in an unhealthy relationship. When you are out of a relationship, you can always turn back and look at all the bad things that happened to you. If you are moving into another relationship, you can be sure of the consequences. You can either correct it or get out of it before you get hurt miserably, again.

If you are bound to stay in a relationship because of external links like parents, kids, sisters, mother and so on, always remember that you are hurting them by being in the relationship. The rule applies here also. Toxic people stay toxic, no matter how many changes you try to do with yourself. There is no good reason that you should put up with him. If he wants to be miserable, that’s his choice and problem. You deserve to be happy, even if that means cutting them out of the equation of your life.

You get suppressed, yes you do! It affects your personal growth. One of the key signs that you are heading towards a bad relationship is when you start blaming each other for everything that is happening around you. “You shouldn’t have”, “You didn’t”, “Why did you” and things like that. This kind of constant browbeating causes a very bad personal growth if you are on the receiving end. It makes you feel small about yourself. Opinions and feelings do not matter here from their side. This in turn takes a turn on your personal growth as a person and creates an aversion towards everything that is happening around you. A healthy relationship encourages growth and dialogue on both sides.

Toxic relationship with this nature pushes away relationships around you like friends, family and even your coworkers. It leads to a very outright abusive nature and makes you wonder why you got into the relationship in the first place. By being willing to let go of a relationship of this sort, you are subconsciously telling yourself and people around you that you are ready and upbeat about moving ahead. You definitely are worth loving, so if you are facing anything close on these lines, do not hesitate to just let go of the relationship. It is fine to move on when you know it’s not just worth it. This way, at least you can find someone who loves you for the way you are.

This is a strong point that every woman has to understand. If you are in a relationship which involves emotional, physical, psychological or sexual abuse, just get out of the relationship. Remember that you and your children will be undergoing the same abuse again and again. You deserve to teach your kids what a lovely relationship looks like.

If they are going to see and find out that you are being abused or beaten, they will not only feel bad, but it is so bound to happen that, they might follow to be ‘you’ someday. So always remember to stand up for yourself. If not for yourself, give your children something they deserve.Brazening it out, is your right as an adult, but you need to bear in mind that if your partner is willing to strike or emotionally hurt you, it’s likely only a matter of time before they start doing the same thing to your children because your partner doesn’t think you have the courage to stand up to them or leave.

There is a phrase called Defense mechanism. Men tend to use that on women a lot,if you give them the room. They tend to tell you something that you actually do not believe, but since they are saying it again and again, you are bound to believe something that is not true. Words like “You couldn’t last one day without me” , “You made me do that”, are just blaming games played by your partner because he knows that no matter what you will stick to him. Do not believe the lies or the hype here. Walking away shows personal strength and the courage to stand on your own two feet, without someone else rubber-stamping your daily activities or life.

Toxic relationships are purely emotional isolation. They cause many other effects like depression, mental tension, blood pressure, whatnot! They also make you take wrong decisions which is not healthyfor you and people around you. This ignores entirely the possible emotional and physical harm an abusive partner can perpetrate on you. You would be surprised just how cheap (financially) walking away is, compared to therapy and anti-depressants, especially when children are involved.

This kind of relationship is totally one sided. It’s all about one person to the exclusion of the other. It will make you feel miserable, unworthy, hopeless. You are your own person, with your own unique value and things to offer the world. Anyone who tells you otherwise, is doing so precisely, so they can keep you under their thumb. You know you’re worth more, so be worth more. Walking away from a toxic relationship is the first step to finding something beautiful with someone who will love and treasure you because of everything you are, not in spite of it.

No one should ever feel imprisoned in a relationship of any kind where their peace of mind, emotional and physical health, safety, or security is or could be compromised. You are a unique and beautiful individual with a lot to offer, and you owe it to yourself (and your children, where applicable) to find that special someone who sees and loves you for you.

Take appropriate actions if that is what makes you do so. Call the police or complain to any of the domestic violence organization if you think doing so is right. You stand as a priority always. Remember, that no one can pull you down! Just be bold and scars will heal under your beauty! Yes, even your mental scars will heal if you gather the courage to take a bold step towards making your life beautiful.

-Pavithra Ravi