Things people aren’t telling you about marriage

No matter how many years you know the guy for, how many times you have slept together, how many experiences you have shared, it is what happens after marriage, that counts! You did not have an idea of him being this uncontrollable moron when you were dating. All of a sudden, you discover such really annoying small and tiny details which he hid from you throughout the relationship. He snores, clips his toenails to the sink, doesn’t leave up the toilet seat and whatnot! It is awkward to adjust to the initial situations at first.

Well, it isn’t all that correct that you get to blame him alone. The pressure of putting our best self in front of our lovers comes into us So, even he is bound to find out your irritating habits and secrets. So, it is going to be super awkward for both of you.

When you were in love, all you did, was to cuddle up and curled to your boyfriend. When you get married, though the initial times are nice and cuddle-ey, you will fall out of that phase sooner or later. After a tiring day at the office or home, you do not want to cuddle because you start to sweat if you curl up for long hours. You need your space and want to sleep on your side of the bed. This doesn’t mean you are losing interest in your few found marriage life, it just means you are finding a good-balance in your new life.

When you get married, you are bound to move everything from your house. Brushes, shampoos, conditioners, razors, straightener, curler and everything would be moved into the guy’s house. Bathrooms never have enough wardrobes or shelves for you to adjust and keep all your girl stuff. You either have to re-make your shower room, or could get easier with the brands he uses and try adjusting to that. If not, ask him to shift to your brand, which is way easier and you get your way.

You’d think cookingfor two would be easy, what with less food to purchase and fewer opinions to poll. However, you’ll soon find that most recipes aren’t written for two people and making the same few dishes over and over gets old fast. Stock up on recipes for favorite dishes from both your home and your spouse’s and get creative with ways of using your leftovers or simply order food on days you don’t want to cook.

Your husband has furniture, you have it too, Your husband has tables, you have it too, he has couches, you have too and it just goes on. Yes, so it literally becomes like two houses in one. This is bound to happen in every marriage. This clutter will make way to your first few arguments what to keep and what to donate. Prevent this from happening to you by keeping better track of what you’re given and politely declining what you really don’t need.

This is going to happen to every girl. Your girlfriends are going to matter to you, but just not as much as they used to. You would start relating less to your friends, whether they are single or married. Of course it is fine to keep in touchwith your good old friends. You just have to be extremely careful when it comes to your spouse and his priorities of you having friends. He wouldn’t appreciate if there are guys coming over to his house at odd hours, like how it used to happen. It is just safer and you can be out of problems if that is the case. Your spouse should be your main confidante and shoulder to cry on, and you should be his.

In the hush hush of everything, do not forget that you and your better half have to go ahead and pay the bills of the marriage. For some couples, their first arguments are about how and what to spend their money on. Instead of feeling overwhelmed and frustrated, try to see the humor in the situation and leave your parents out of it. These decisions need to be made by you two as a couple

It is a tough thing that you might not get the desired space you are looking for. Just because you are married, you needn’t have to wake up every morning looking at each other. Taking space is every person’s personal choice. Set some time for yourself and do whatever you want to do that does not involve your husband. Go for walks, dance classes or even cycling alone would be a great idea to have your alone time.

When people ask you how long you have been married, you might tell them the number of weeks or months. That is when the warning comes out “The honeymoon phase, doesn’t for long”. This is when you should tell yourself, that the honeymoon phase is just a number and eye wash. You do not really have to worry about this phase because it depends on what you want it to be. If you want a longer phase, you will have it. So, their comments are the last thing you should have in mind.

Being married is fun and exciting and stressful and different and it’ll take time to get used to all the changes it brings to your life. It’s OK if everything doesn’t run perfectly at first. That’s the fun part — learning and growing and progressing together, and looking forward to a lifetime of sharing and loving. So, shed your fears about marriage. Yes, these are some things no one’s telling you about marriage. But you sure can crack it easy if you and your partner believe in yourselves. Love is the key to anything. So, if you are wondering what to do, go ahead, get married and explore all these amazing tiny problems together!

-Pavithra Ravi