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Fighting all the time? Bored as hell (even with the sex)? Yes, relationship ruts are normal, and they can also be frustrating, isolating, and simply no fun. Have you always wondered if there have been ‘off’ weeks continuous? It is normal and totally fine when people with long term relationships go through intimacy issues. There would have been days when you are too busy at work or your husband does not care to ask you how your day was. Fortunately or unfortunately, every relationship is different from each other. There is no specific time frame for these relationship lulls. If you have been facing such issues, then you are on the right page. That is why we have gathered some tested and tried ways of rebuilding interest in a relationship.
Here’s How To Build Interest In Lost Relationship
1The Boredom pothole-
Bring new activities into your relationship. But wait, not the same old things like watching TV or going shopping. Try sky diving, taking a weekend trip, riding roller coasters or a couple massages which enhance couple satisfaction. These things that are referred to are something that excites both of you and takes you to a different world all together. Play games at home. Play naked poker or go hide and seeking – playing together can boost up relationship happiness. Clean your house together. Talk about things you missed doing together and things will just follow.
2Create Couple lists-
Write down all that you wanted to do, having each other alongside. Cook dinner together once a week; go to a cafe or bookstore. Kick out phones, laptops, tablets and pay attention to each other. Finish one by one on your bucket listand gift each other with something after each task. Make mini dates at home. If it gets too difficult to make time every night, meet up for a 20 minute break outside one of your offices, surprise the other one by making a picnic lunch or try to catch up a late movie and popcorn fun.
3Communicate-
Say nice things to each other and express appreciation through positive feedbacks. Talk what you like about each other and how you have been missing them. A relationship rut can be regenerated when you tell your partner how much you love him and doing this will make you feel more attractive and confident. Prepare a right and wrong list about the other and show it to them. Communication is the key to working out any relationship.
4Talk to others-
It is always important to understand that others might be facing similar issues too. Listen and talk to friends or people at work. It is normal to stay behind a fighting blind, but when you open up, you will know that there have been more people solving the bigger issues in a snap. We can benefit from hearing how other people deal with similar or bigger situations. It can give you an idea to change the approach of looking at a definite problem.
5Make a sensual appeal-
An inviting dress is all it takes for you to make sure your decaying relationship move from the dinner table to the couch and then to your bed. Looking lull or making a dull appearance makes no sense when it comes to a romantic dinner. Wear the best outfit with fewer accessories that would accentuate the beauty and the inner beast that you have been hiding. Look perfect to make your husband go head over heels. Make the right move. If you have decided to make a dinner date at home, always cook for him. Never order from outside. Play hard to get and impress the man with your sexual moves.
6Create a fantasy jar-
This can be a separate game by itself. Create a fantasy jar where you can write down all that you have a fantasy for. Try to do them together. You can fantasize about going out on a date to a roof top resto-bar having a personal guitarist to play for you, to kiss on the Eiffel tower, to take a trip to some exotic place, to make your husband cook and many more. These fantasies not only pep you up but also give you the need to do something interesting with your partner which works wonders when accomplished.
7Switch up your look-
Always make sure you have a new style for yourself. Update yourself with the new trending clothes, accessories and haircuts. It is important to look new and good in a relationship to keep your partner excited in his activities with you. It is important to look good from the inside and outside, mainly because it boosts your confidence internally. Not only are you more confident, it helps your partner to notice and respond to the ‘new you’ in a way that reignites the glint.
8Work on yourself-
It is important to regain interest in a relationship, but to go forward; you need to always make sure you work on yourself. Relationship satisfaction is tied to personal life and personal life is tied to you. It is a cycle and the process starts with you. The happier a person is in general, the happier they make the relationship. Do not blame or rely on the partner to be a happy person. Start from yourself. If you look at things in a positive way, everything else looks good and positive. It is important to give in your 100% and the rest will flow.
Everything said and done, remember that not all relationships work on the above tips. There are a few which might be very trivial and you are either making it an issue or creating unwanted thoughts. There might even be some that go overboard and you are not able to see the negative aspects. Not every relationship is worth saving. Physical, sexual and mental abuse is never okay. If you are still confused what to do, always opt for a professional shrink who will help you out!
Stay happy and spread joy!
-Pavithra Ravi
